People say childhood lays the foundation for the psychological growth of a person. Your happiest and most cherished memories are from your days in school when all you had to worry about is when the P.E hour will start or the lunch bell will ring. But sometimes there are children who do feel left out of the social nucleus because of various reasons. These children become targets for school bullies. Now there are two sides to this coin. Both parties aren’t at fault and there are ways parents and adults can deal with these situations.
Maintaining an open channel of communication
Communication is essential in any parent-child relationship . Positive parenting helps you build trust with your child, let them know they can tell you anything without them (being afraid of judgement or criticism from you) worrying about being judged or shouted at by you. Share your experiences with them and remember that they each have a unique identity with different strengths, weaknesses and ways of coping with different situations. Only when parents are open with their children will they be able to discover and help them resolve their issues.
Build their self esteem
Having low self-esteem and child behavior problems are some of the consequences of bullying. It raises doubt in a child’s mind about their abilities and whether they belong. Make sure that your child understands that he is not to be blamed. Make sure you let your child know that he is as equal and as important as anybody else and no one has the right to make them feel otherwise.
Peer support and new friendships
A good way to make a child feel better and improve their confidence is by forging new friendships. Help and encourage your child to find new friends in school. If he/she is a little sensitive then even making a small circle of one or two friends is preferable to try and be accepted by a larger social group. Take some time to discuss friendship with your child and emphasize how important it is to be with friends who respect each other and have a healthy relationship. It’s important for your child to create a balance between spending time alone and with friends to help them successfully learn and develop interpersonal skills.
Dealing with the ‘bully’
We have to remember that the bully who is causing menace in school is also just a child. Usually, children who have trouble coping with studies or are subject to abuse at home, vent out their frustration in the form of bullying. As responsible adults and parents it is your responsibility to raise these issues and find out the troubles a ‘bully’ child might be facing and help them overcome their obstacles. Teachers, school counsellor and the school staff members should also be involved in talking the to this particular child’s parents to understand where his/ her anger and frustration is coming from and what steps they should take in order to help him/her overcome these obstacles.
Childhood is a kid’s right
School days are meant to be filled with fond memories. Bullying takes away the memorable experiences associated with one’s childhood. Every child has a right to be treated respectfully. Bullied children are innocent and do nothing to deserve such treatment. Take a strong stand if your child is being bullied and make sure your child experiences a healthy and happy childhood. And remember the ‘bully’ is also probably going through a tough time and is lashing out at anyone he/she can. Children on both sides are emotionally affected and need help finding their way.