Becoming a parent is like a Roller Coaster ride: moments of sheer exhilaration mixed thoroughly with stretches of anxiety and apprehension. The key to coping up with this awesome responsibility is to keep cool.
Form A Couple Team
A couple who supports each other, develops a deep and mutual understanding, is the best preparation for the couple and the baby. It is a good time for both of you to communicate emotions, thoughts and concerns to each other. This not only helps to sort out the near future events but also strengthens the bond that is required for your baby to grow securely and healthily.
Find a Reliable Doctor
An experienced and reliable doctor whom you can trust is essential. Meet your doctor in person and decide for yourself if the practitioner is ideal for you and your new family member.
Create a Physically Healthy Environment
Discuss your diet, exercise and rest plans with your doctor. An expectant mother should be well-equipped with the basic knowledge with carrying a pregnancy to term safely and healthily. Use this opportunity to clarify life style issues (Smoking/Alcohol), and the use of medication during pregnancy. Keep abreast of the health and environmental advisories, as pertaining to expecting women.
Maintain Emotional Health
The sudden hormonal and physical changes during pregnancy typically result in emotional fluctuations (Mood Swings). The supportive spouse whose responsibility is less immediately apparent at this time can help by understanding and listening to each other’s anxiety.
Adjust Thinking
The changes both current and upcoming usually provoke Mood-swings; you may alternate between thinking about how you may be the best or worst parents, to whether or not the baby is healthy or otherwise etc. These can quickly turn into mood swings. It helps keeping a humorous and upbeat attitude, but remember to address those, which pose real challenges by discussing them with your spouse, relatives and friends.
Rethink Life and Relationship Priorities
Parents of newborn babies find themselves overwhelmed and pre-occupied by their baby’s needs, so much so that their routine activities are interrupted. It is helpful for you to understand that this pre-occupation is natural and crucial for the baby’s growth. As expectant parents you may start to re-think life’s priorities: for example shifting from a career centred life to a family centred life. This may also mean changes in relationship: for example, spending less time with friends and social gatherings. Many thorny issues surround the degree of participation and responsibility of parents in law, so come to a mutual agreement and stand by each other.
Maintain Social Contact and Support
Although you may find yourself spending time with your relatives and friends, it is still a good idea for you to rally social support as these contacts may bring along with them a wealth of referrals, information and parenting experience.
Parenthood, or even the prospect of parenthood, can generate much anxiety, at times eclipsing the joy. Indeed, there are many changes taking place from pregnancy through to parenthood and they will continue to evolve over the months and years to come. For many parents, just the thought of potential challenges can be overwhelming.
But, it can be a pretty positive thing if you start reframing, and begin regarding these worries as a signal for you to prepare for the upcoming changes. Here are some tips:
- Financial Arrangement
Assess your financial situation together with your partner or seek advice from a financial planner or even a friend who has gone through this phase of life, and realistically project the expected fiscal outlay for your new child. This may mean changing some spending and saving habits. - Physical Environment
Making room for your baby can be quite a fun activity, but bear in mind the practical considerations and the other limitations – for example, how to baby-proof your apartment, temperature and humidity control etc. - Adjustment of Priority
Some new mothers find themselves struggling to strike a balance between care-giving and career development. Though crucial to healthy development, the amount of attention and care your baby needs may result in major interruptions to your pre-existing work-life arrangements. Prioritizing your values helps you keep your mind focused and allows you to live your life more effectively and efficiently. - Sharing of Responsibilities
Cooperative and supportive co-parenting from the very beginning helps create a secure base for your baby to grow physically and emotionally, and strengthens the bond between the couple. For the mother, having a participatory husband helps reduce stress. For the father, sharing of responsibilities reduces the risk of an unbalanced relationship. - Parenting Education
Information is power. You will feel empowered by familiarizing yourself with knowledge and skills pertaining to child development, parenting skills, as well as legal (e.g. registration of the birth) and health requirements (e.g. vaccinations) regarding a newborn. - Social Support
Besides getting help from parents, relatives and friends, you may also consider finding a reliable nanny, domestic helper(s) and community support like day care in advance. - Time for Two
Although it is normal for the baby to take the center stage, it is very important that you and your spouse find ‘together’ time to reconnect; it may prove too easy to take each other for granted. - Time for Oneself
Taking turns to care for the baby also helps to release one of you for relaxation and personal time.