John always wanted to study humanities but due to family pressure and peer pressure he couldn’t take it. His father wanted him to pursue engineering so he had no other choice but to take up Science. Initially John was happy because his friends were there, but he was not very confident about this subject.
John always wanted to change his subject but he wasn’t allowed to. He used to fear that he wouldn’t score well, and soon his fear turned into reality and had to repeat eleventh standard. His father realised that it was difficult for him to cope up, so he wanted him to take up commerce.
His father didn’t want him to take up humanities as he was more worried about what his relatives would think. John’s mother supported him and she convinced his father so that he could take up humanities. Though his father was not very pleased with his decision but still he didn’t say anything as he realised that this was the best option for him and that he was really confident about it.
John was going through a bad relationship during that time and he got distracted in twelfth standard which affected his pre-board results. His father got one more chance to point finger at him, he always thought that he cannot do well. But he had to show him, so he really worked hard and scored well in boards. This boosted his confidence and he was really happy with his performance.
After boards, he wanted to do photojournalism and he has always been passionate about photography. John started doing research on it and reading about the course. But his father was not at all happy with that. He wanted him to pursue Sociology for his degree. He always liked Sociology but he never wanted to pursue his career in this field.
John was not satisfied with this decision, he always wanted to do something where he can show his creativity. He loves painting, music and photography. But he was never allowed to study any of these as his father thought that this field had no secured job.
He didn’t want to go against his father so he took up Sociology, initially he was coping with it but then he had to repeat one more year as he didn’t do well. John was very scared to tell his parents but he had no other choice. His father was very upset with him and again his confidence level went down as he thought that he was good for nothing.
John worked very hard not for himself but to prove his father wrong. The same cycle continued, he is doing his masters right now and he is not happy with himself. He is very disappointed with what is happening. And even after completing his masters his father wants him to sit for other entrance exams.
He cannot make his father understand that he doesn’t want to do something that he wants him to do. His mother is supporting him; she knows that he is not confident in what he is doing. She knows that if he pursues his career in photography or something in this field, he will be good at it. But every time he talks about something that he wants to do, his father mocks him and that brings down his self-esteem.
John really wishes he could do things that he wants to do and not regret later about it. He has been staying away from home for five years and that is why his father wants him to come back as he wants his son to be around him and for that he has to study what his father wants him to do.
In the movie 3 idiots, Madhavan’s character is almost similar to John’s story, but in the movie he was forced to do engineering even though he wanted to do wildlife photography. And like any other Bollywood movie he left his course, convinced his father and he followed his dream. But John wants to finish his course and then do something that he is passionate about. But every time I he tried speaking his heart out, he never got a positive response.
John wishes someday he will follow his dream. He wants to do something different and still make his father proud. He doesn’t want the same cycle to continue like it has been happening in every phase of his life or rather every photograph of his life because for him each phase or each moment is a photograph which wants to capture.
The debate still continues on who should choose a career for a child, whether its parents or children. Every parent wants bright future of their children, but sometimes they get too involved and take decision for their children which they don’t like. All kids have fantasies of what they want to become, sometimes it changes as they grow up and sometimes it remains the same. However, they should be always given the liberty to choose their career because their interests lie on that and they know how good they are.
Tips for parents that might be helpful.